transitioning from one house to two

As you transition into your new life as a co-parent, remember that this is a major life alteration for your little one(s). Unless you are making a break from an abusive, domineering, nightmare of a spouse who treated both you and your child/children with contempt, creating massive mental turmoil, please refrain from celebrating your move in front of the children. If you are deeply upset by the separation, please refrain from crying in your wet blanket in front of your kids as well. They are dealing with enough of their own emotions. It would be unfair to them for you to either celebrate their uprooted life or appear so weak that they feel you are unavailable for supporting them.

Kids shouldn't feel like they are merely visiting at either home whether it's mom's or dad's, mom's or mom's, or dad's or dad's - what ever your situation is. Kids should have a good amount of clothes and toys and personal belongs and space at either place. My daughter always talks as if she's fortunate to have 2 houses. She has no idea what it would mean to pack a bag to go over to her dad's or over to my house. She walks into either place and is completely at home, has everything she needs at each location.

There will be times when it seems like all the "good" clothes end up at one parent's house, but just deal with it rationally and talk about it with your ex. -you can come to some agreement about this over the phone - no need to involve you kid in smuggling clothes around or lose your head about it in front of the children. That will just make them feel sad and guilty.

When moving out of one and into two homes, for the sake of your child, don't fill the entire space with boxes that need to be unpacked. store them somewhere (the garage, closets, basement, etc.) and take one box at a time, unpack it, and go get another. Kids don't need continual visual reminders that their world is in upheaval. They are well aware of that.

One thing we did was buy bunk beds and split them up so our daughter sleeps in essentially the same bed at both places. If anyone reading this has any other ideas about transitioning from one house to two, please add a comment below!